It's official

i'm underweight again. just barely though.
this morning i was 117... and that puts me just under the cutoff for a healthy bmi.

i'm going to be thrilled when i hit 115 again. i was soooo happy there. 110 even better.

i dont want to get close to 100 again. that scared me too much. this'll be my compromise :)

stay safe lovelies <3

update

Soooo... I'm trying to work things out with my bf. I'm not sure if i really want to or not.

I never really did get over the fact that he slept with someone when we first started dating... i did reject him big time, but i came back and he went for her. then he came back when she went for someone else because apparently she didnt appreciate that he was so hung up on me. who knows

i dont doubt that he loves me more then anything on this earth, but he's so insecure. the last time we had a big fight and almost broke up he had lunch with an old fling. i guess she needed help with something and he helped her. they werent together again, but i dont like that he keeps women like that in his life. i also dont like that he's capable of 'friends with benefits' I could never do that, especially at my age. anyways... he's much less experienced then i am, he says that he was just frustrated and made some mistakes... but his mistakes and how he deals with things bother me.

so i told him to call me when he gets help. he called me after he posted an ad online. he says he cant get me off his mind and that there is no one else he's interested in because i am it for him. he deleted his ad.

so i dont know if i should take him back... there's something about him that i cant let go of either. he says now that he'll do whatever it takes to win me back. should i let him try?

sometimes i'm sure once we see each other again it will all fall apart anyhow, so i have one foot in and one foot out.

I hate holidays. I'm grumpy and depressed and taking it out on everyone in my life :(

on the bright side, i havent eaten anything bad... and yesterday and today were all really low cal days :) yey me!

Merry Christmas ♥

Its odd i feel like i've lost... but my scale was the same this am.

i've got my period even and my clothes are fitting better... i think that happened the last time, so i'm crossing my fingers that the # on the scale will be lower in the next couple days!

Still kickin

So i've been up and down and all over the place.

i'm gonna give c&s another go. only swallowing negative calories nothing more!

now that i know i can taste stuff when i want to, i havent bothered. but when i just restrict, i crave too much.

must be reverse psychology or something!

HI

hi ladies... lol, does anyone actually still follow this?

i've gained. i dont know what it is, but i cant seem to fast like i used to. maybe i should take some of my own advice from the archives :(

i'm so depressed....

hope u are all doing well

still fasting

Day three, and I'm 112. Kinda cool considering I was at 118-120 for quite some time.

I almost broke it today thou when i was feeling weak, but after getting up and drinking lots of water and showering, I'm feeling alot better. I have all weekend off, so if i can get away with it, i'll keep going.

i'm supposed to see a friend tomorrow thou, so i may have to break it then if she decides that she wants to go for dinner... it just sucks cause it gets easier after day 3 for me. but i'm hoping that she'll settle for going for tea or something anyhow.

i'm hoping i wake up tomorrow at 110. i miss being 110. i'd love 105, but if i have to break the fast, i dont think i'll get there.

i want to start training for a marathon, so i'm gonna have to break it eventually. but i'd love to go a week, and just detox all this crap out of me!